30/30: 10 Stitches. Wounds. Infallible God.

15 01 2009

stitchesAs a kid, we loved to ride our bikes up to the park and play baseball. One hot summer day shaped the way I would ride my bike for the rest of my life. As normal, I was heading full steam across the ball diamond directly for backstop. As I crossed home plate I slammed on the brakes to do a sliding sideways stop. But this time something went wrong. The pedal got stuck somewhere in the middle and the brakes didn’t engage. Nowhere to go, except straight into the backstop. I flew up and when I came down, I ripped the skin on my knee wide open. I know this for a fact there is something VERY CREEPY about seeing your own white bone without beauty of your skin over it. Fortunately, it didn’t stay creepy for long. Within a second my knee was covered with blood.

Ten stitches later, life returned to a normal or so I thought. But something changed inside me. I was different. I would now always check my brakes before approaching a dead stop. I noticed I now didn’t pedal at the same breakneck speeds. I found myself holding back instead of going all out.

Life has a way of doing the same thing to us. All of us at some point all of us will experience life scars. Sometimes it’s a circumstance or disappointment that cuts us deep. Sometimes it’s a wound caused by words someone else said to us. Sometimes it’s the hurt of what someone did to us. Sometimes it’s a pain caused by our own sin. Often the biggest scars come from those that we love or loved the most…a parent, a spouse, an ex, or a friend.

What we often do is cover up those scars and pretend what happened doesn’t effect us now. But we know that’s not true. We secretly decide to put on the breaks and not trust people at the level we did before. We put up walls, so we will not experience the pain of being let down again. We don’t want to be creeped out by the bone, so we slow down and love only at ½ speed.

Lately, I’m discovering is that Jesus is infallible. Not only does He never make mistakes, but he is incapable of making a mistake. Others may fail us, but He will never fail us. Others may let us down, but He will never let us down. When I’m face to face with his infallibility, I realize just how fallible I am. He is so different than me. I want to hide the stitches, but He wants to uncover the wounds. Why? So he can heal and restore me.

“Nothing is beyond his redemption. Nothing is beyond his restoration. Nothing is beyond his healing power. Not the bruises. Not the scars. Not the pain… If God were wrong some of the time, I would trust him enough to obey him…. but God is wildly infallible-in every way. ”
(Margaret Feinberg, the organic God. p.106)

Because we walk with a God who is wildly infallible, I can begin to lower our protective behavior and begin to love others at full speed again. Yes, people will let me down. Yes, I will even let myself down. But I the Infallible God will never let me down.

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