Proven Marriage Advice from REAL Experts

12 01 2010

I saw an interesting fact this morning from “Eat, Love, Pray” author Elizabeth Gilbert in Time Magazine: Only 15% of people who marry before 25 years of age end up staying together. Instead of focusing on the negative, I was wondering what makes a marriage beat the odds and thrive. From the FaceBook and Twitter world, here’s the advice from friends married before 25 and still going strong!

My advice is three things; God, Communication and Laughter. Scott, married 22 years

The grass is never greener on the other side. Every marriage has its ups and downs.Laura, married 28 years

We always remind ourselves that a healthy marriage requires work and effort everyday. Take time for each other, don’t yell when you disagree, and if all else fails – give your problems up to God. Remember, nothing that’s worthwhile comes easy. Brandon, married 7 years

1. Love God more than anyone else (including your spouse). 2. God’s Grace. 3. Compromise. 4. Compromise. 5. Compromise. Amy, married 20 years

Tend to the needs of the other. There are no other options but he and me. Extend grace. Laugh a little. Mary Jo, married 30 years

It’s not EASY!!! Marriage is a full-time job. Know that going in and you aren’t surprised. Promise to never say the D word. You don’t want that worry hanging out somewhere in the back of your mind. Holly, married 22 years

I would say fiercely protect your time, date nights! Geoff, married 6 years

We keep the lines of communication open. We are also each others best friends. So work together and don’t blame each other. Prayer, God and trust sure helps. Kim, married 21 years

Think of your partner before yourself. Jesus did it, so can we. David, married 15 years

Don’t try to change your spouse. If you think someone has to change in your marriage, it will have to be YOU. One of the biggest blessings in my life has been that Dave helps with everything around the house and does so without resenting it.Wendy, married 33 years

Never say the “D” word. If you rule out divorce as an option, it makes the disagreements and arguments a little easier to get through. stop focusing on how things might be better apart, or somewhere else, and start using that energy to focus on making the relationship they’re in better. Believe it or not, every marriage/relationship will have its own set problems and tough things to work through…and really, be careful, the grass might be browner on the other side. –Jodi, married 19 years

Your comments got me thinking: Listen to the Real Experts! We hear all kinds of relationship advice from people (media, authors, filmmakers, etc.) who have a lot to say about marriage, but haven’t lived through the ups and downs of a long-term committed marriage. I’ve been married 18 years and I’m still learning it’s one of the hardest, most rewarding thing you’ll ever do. Keep growing. Keep seeking advice from real experts. Keep learning from the success of others.

Wise words bring many benefits, and hard work brings rewards. Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others.” Proverbs 12:14-15

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